Someone new came into my life. I am the ultimate optimist. However, after years of dating, somewhere along the way I have adopted a more cautious approach to men. I tend to be somewhat hesitant to place all my proverbial eggs into one basket. Call me a little “gun shy”, but I tend to approach love from a more thoughtful perspective. So in comes this new guy and for some odd reason it mattered to me what he thought of my writing. I decided to share a piece of my work and with bated breath I waited for his response. He uttered the words: “Donna you have a way with words that draws people in”.
I was speechless and somewhat moved by his comment. I’m not sure what I was expecting to hear, but for some reason I was stirred by his reaction. I scanned my mind trying to make sense of what I was feeling, only to be further confused when tears started to fall.
Why was I shedding tears? It befuddled me. Until I was able to take a step back and realize that I was still waiting for validation from others.
No matter the accomplishments, vast successes, or varied achievements – I still had a desire to be told that I am okay. And to hear this new man share something I have heard others state about my writing, was a reminder of what God’s been trying to tell me – I am special, I am wonderful, and I am destined for a great purpose. You see, because God has already accepted me. But I guess I have continued to be more critical, than God. Part of my struggle is due to wondering how could one think highly of them self when they are quite aware of the areas where they fall short?
I guess the most succinct answer would be to practice the art of self-acceptance. To be able to look yourself in the mirror and feel good about all of you, not just when you’re your best self – but even in your moments of anger, frustration, or jealousy. The acceptance of self seems to be the way to feel good about the ‘you’ that you are!
This little refresher lesson that I was receiving on self-acceptance reminded me of two quotes on this topic:
- “The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with your self” – Mark Twain
- “Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her” – Lao Tzu
So I shall continue to strive for absolute self-acceptance, while still acknowledging that we’re all just a work in progress.
Life According to Me,